The Hillside hotel, Ventnor, has been labelled the second best hotel in the country.
THE VIEW FROM HERECONGRATULATIONS to The Hillside in Ventnor, not least for making us all sit up at the ann-ouncement it is the second best hotel in the country.
Surprising, but true, according to travel website TripAdvisor, which names the Hillside as runner-up in the UK hotel category of its 2012 Travellers’ Choice Awards.
These awards have, inevitably, been dubbed the Oscars of the hotel world, though it is not exactly clear who has done the dubbing. Could it possibly be TripAdvisor?
Still, it’s marvellous to think of this 12-bedroom establishment swanning so magnificently into the highest echelons of hotel swank. Its award confirms its infinite superiority when set against the likes of the Ritz or Claridges, or the upstart Tresanton in Cornwall, which received a ridiculous commendation from some reviewer in TheIndependent.
"If there is any more elegant hotel in Britain … then I have never been there," he wrote. No, dopey, that’s because you haven’t been paying attention to the Oscars of the hotel world, which totally ignore the Tresanton.
Second best hotel in the country, eh? This may come as news to Conde Nast, whose gold list of the seven best hotels in England inexplicably omits the Hillside. They’ve just chosen any old place, such as Raymond Blanc’s Manoir Aux Quat Saisons, which can’t be much cop because it doesn’t get so much as a mention on TripAdvisor’s list.
I don’t know why this is. Perhaps because the Conde Nast awards haven’t been dubbed the Oscars of the hotel world.
Or more probably because it’s all a load of froth and part of the game that panders to our growing obsession with the idea of an award being important or, more significantly, conferring quality and distinction rather than the other way round.
You’ve got an award? Well, you must be good. Not necessarily so.
I have absolutely no doubt the Hillside is a brilliant place, with its guests thoroughly enjoying its high standards of comfort and service. But for TripAdvisor to make these arbitrarily sweeping adjudications is absurd.
The TripAdvisor world is itself by no means universally commended. Customer reviews veer wildly, with the same establishment often being simultaneously praised and vilified.
Many hoteliers are enraged at being condemned on the whim of somebody who may well be a madman. Entrepreneur Duncan Bannatyne considers the site "despicable and cowardly".
These "Oscars of the hotel world" should therefore be taken with a pinch of salt and the Hillside would be well advised just to continue giving excellent service and to let customer satisfaction speak for itself, without the need for some esoteric award.
But people will doubtless continue to be taken in by the plethora of ersatz Oscars.
You can get an award for practically anything and show off about it for years on end.
The Priory School, at Shanklin, for instance. "National Award for Science Teaching — second year running!" it trumpets at the top of its website.
One of its teachers is seemingly "best in the country at teaching GCSE biology to boys".
Oh, for goodness sake. Says who? Says the Good Schools Guide, that’s who, self-appointed judges in the Oscars of biology teaching to boys, surely a highly subjective category.
In any case, the last time Priory School got this award was in 2010, so the whole thing is two years out of date. They weren’t even mentioned last year.
State honours, hotel Oscars, prizes for teaching biology to boys. Who cares?
Too many of us, I fear. The BBC’s former political editor John Cole turned down a CBE, saying: "When I was in the Boys’ Brigade, I was very happy when someone gave me a wayfarer’s badge but I’m a grown-up chap now."
While not many would turn down a CBE, there are nonetheless far too many wayfarer’s badges about, coated with bling under the guise of 'Oscars’. Resist.
It’s what you do, not what you get for doing it, that’s important.
Organ ruling protest swells
I HAVE nothing but admiration for Canon George Raynor, who has railed against Portsmouth Diocese for banning a former sex offender from playing the organ during Sunday services.
The diocese stipulates Robert Stacey go, unaccompanied, to St Michael’s Church, Swanmore, during the week and record music on to a CD.
Canon Raynor says the situation is ridiculous and lacks compassion towards a man who is trying to rebuild his life.
It’s not just about compassion. The whole thing is loopy and does the diocese no credit.
I find the idea of a man supposedly playing the organ alone in a church (but surely with greater opportunity to transgress the rules), far more creepy than someone surrounded by an entire congregation.
Safety in numbers, you know, but above all, care in the community.